As the end of 2015 quickly approaches New Years resolutions are sure to flood the internet. People will claim that this year will be their year; new year, new me! People will flock to gyms, Trader Joe’s and diets they wanted to try.

Don’t get me wrong… If you want to change your lifestyle then so be it, but shut the fuck up. Change is the only thing that will fuel change. Start now, start yesterday. Starting on New Years day is the same as starting “tomorrow,” or “next week.”

If you’re a lazy, fat piece of shit, January 1st will not save you. Nothing will save you. If you plan to proclaim that the new year will bring a new year, it is up to you to bring it or just pipe down and keep it to yourself.

What are my New Years Resolutions you ask? Well…I have none. This year will be like the last one, and the year before that…and so on. It’ll be rad, with the same ol’ me.